Do The Opposite!

We have a choice in dealing with negative emotions, instead of being held back by them, we can flip the script and lean into each moment.

There have been many moments in my life where I have let fear drive my behavior. Whether it was social anxiety or impostor syndrome that kept me locked in my negative thought patterns and from doing what I wanted to be doing.

A few examples of this are:

• not sharing my idea in a meeting because I was worried about how it would be received by others so I kept quiet and regretted it later.

• not applying for a job because I didn't think I was qualified, although looking back the job was a great fit.

• not going to company parties because meeting new people felt awkward and intimidating

One day I decided enough was enough and I was going to speak up and share my idea in a meeting.

As soon as I wanted to share my idea I felt nervous and my physical reactions followed with my face getting red and my palms becoming sweaty.

Once I spoke up and shared my idea during the meeting I realized that lo and behold, the sky didn't fall down as I thought it would. Instead, the conversation continued and instead of feeling regret for not speaking up I felt a sense of relief for not having allowed my emotions to keep me quiet and withdrawn.

It took one experience to help me realize that instead of letting my emotions drive my behavior I could in fact do the opposite of what my emotions were telling me. As long as the action was aligned with my values, the outcome I believe would be better for myself.

A change in approach

Our emotions are valid, but sometimes, they don't fit the facts of the situation and keep us in our well-worn grooves of how we respond, which keeps us from accomplishing what matters most to us.

Instead of defaulting to our old ways of dealing with negative emotions such as anxiety, shame, anger, or sadness, we have another option available, and that is to do the opposite of what our feelings are telling us.

Instead of withdrawing when we feel anxious, we can do the opposite, be open to the situation, and approach it as a learning opportunity.

Instead of hiding ourselves when we feel shame, we do the opposite and speak up, maintain eye contact, and lean into the situation.

We always have a choice in each moment, we can either keep doing the same things over and over again to momentarily help us feel better or we can be mindful and act in a healthier way that aligns with our values and how we want to show up in life by doing the opposite.

Nothing in life is to be feared; it is only to be understood. Now is the time to understand more so that we may fear less.
– Marie Curie

Let's choose to do the opposite!

✊🏽