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How to overcome the fear of success?
I feared success for a long time.
Yeah, it's a strange thing to say, but when I look back at my past behavior, I can see how I have been sabotaging my own success. Fear of being the center of attention was one of my biggest culprits. I avoided the limelight as much as possible. There is also the quitting, procrastination, and lack of confidence in myself. For example, at work, I didn't take the opportunity to present my work because I was afraid of being found out as an impostor in front of other designers.
I wonder how I even got to where I am considering this fear of success. Of course, at that time, I had not labeled it because I didn't understand the challenge I was facing; I didn't understand what a fear of success meant.
So let's look at what it is, how to identify it, and what specific steps you can take to move past it and achieve your potential.
What is the Fear of Success?
Admittedly, the concept of having a fear of success was difficult for me to wrap my head around. My first response was, why would anyone fear success? Isn't that what we all want, after all? After digging into it quite a bit, I realized how this works.
The fear of success isn't about success itself. Instead, it is a fear of the cost of achieving success and whether we can pull it off.
Here are some reasons we may fear success:
We fear the change that will happen within us and losing our essence
We fear others will think we're being self-centered and fear the backlash we may face
We fear putting in the hard work needed to achieve our goals
We fear being in the spotlight and having all eyes on us
We fear that we won't live up to expectations once we do achieve success
We fear being wide open to criticism from others
Now that we know why we may have a fear of success, this is how the fear of success can show up in our life:
Playing small - When we are afraid of success, we keep ourselves from goals that challenge us too much, so we play small and stay in our comfort zone.
Procrastinating on tasks - We put off important tasks that are critical to our success.
Striving for perfection - Believing that we have a high bar to reach, we never meet that impossible standard.
Avoiding attention - We hide from people to keep from being reminded of our fear
Self-sabotaging - Deliberately setting up obstacles in our way to not achieve success.
Low confidence - Believing that we cannot do the work needed to succeed.
What can you do about it?
The fear of success can do real damage in our life. It can hold you back and keep you from ever realizing your potential. However, there are steps you can take right away to undo the damage and get back to achieving your goals and the success you envision. Here are my recommendations because these are the specific strategies I used to get out from the grips of this fear:
Partnering with a coach
My coach, Oli Anderson, was the voice of reason when my own thoughts were too limiting. Oli helped me realize just how deep this inner challenge was for me. Having a coach was a lifesaver for me. Sometimes the fears we have are too strong, and we need someone to help us who isn't too close to the situation emotionally. A coach can do just that.
Journaling
There is a lot of inner work that we need to do to begin dismantling this fear. The best way that I recommend is to begin journaling and writing your thoughts down daily. This helps to create separation between your fears and yourself so you can examine their root causes and begin seeing them objectively.
Meditation
Understanding that our thoughts are not who we are was a big step for me to create the separation needed between my thoughts and my fears. Realizing that thoughts come and must go, there is no need to become a servant to them.
Taking action
Once you have identified the root cause of your fears, taking action by doing the inner work necessary is the only way to overcome it.
Be Patient and Take Action
Overcoming the fear of success is crucial to achieving our goals and bringing our vision to life, but for real change to take place, it needs time, patience, and focus. Be patient with yourself. Get help if needed because sometimes we are too close to our fears to imagine ourselves without them.
By understanding that our fears are simply unreal thoughts we have identified with, we can keep them from doing any more harm to us.
It's time to break free from the fear of success so we can realize our full creative potential.
Your destiny awaits!🚀